Understanding Introspective vs. Emotionally Reactive People
I’ve experienced two kinds of people in my life:
introspective
adjective
- Inspecting within; seeing inwardly; capable of, or exercising, inspection; self-conscious.
Similar: self-conscious- Involving the act or results of conscious knowledge of physical phenomena; — contrasted with associational.
- Examining one’s own perceptions and sensory experiences; contemplative or thoughtful about oneself.
Introspectives are people like Socrates, who said “The unexamined life is not worth living”. These people self-reflect constantly. They engage in reflective judgment. They analyze their beliefs for any faults. They look at losing a debate as a win for themselves by bettering their own arguments. They try to look at the world and see it as it is. They do.
When we feel stressed, angry, or hurt, we tend to react impulsively. We are in a state of fight-or-flight and tend to react emotionally, that is, to overreact. That overreaction is emotional reactivity.
In that moment, our perceptions of the situation are altered. The emotional charge prevents us from seeing the situation for what it is. Instead, we react. At this point, there is no listening going on anymore. Our emotions and defenses are driving our behaviors.
Emotionally reactive people are ruled by emotional reasoning. Life is dictated by how they feel, rather than any kind analytical examination. They are angered when questioned, many times lashing out at those who question their beliefs. They build up their beliefs on facts that support the belief (often by using a begging the question logical fallacy). They try to mold the world into how they feel it should be. They feel.
When I meet someone displaying behaviour I don’t understand, I try to evaluate which type of person they are.